Anguished English: An Anthology of Accidental Assaults Upon Our torrent

This book contains headlines, malapropisms, school essays, parental notes to teachers, lawyer-witness dialogues, signs and other assaults on the English language that provide hours of chuckles and retelling to those who have not read it.

When you read a want ad that says: "Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating," or the headline "Stiff Opposition Expected to Casketless Funeral Plan," you have to laugh.

It also reminds me of what a boss once told me: You can always deny what you said; you can never deny what you wrote.